Monday, January 16, 2012

Well, that didn't work out

So my relationship with my girlfriend lasted for all of 9 days.  It's wasn't working too well because she lived over an hour away and was working constantly.  I could tell that it was coming before that.  She didn't seem as enthused as I did about being together.  Every time I would make an attempt to arrange a time for us to see each other, something else would come up.  Which to a point is understandable; we both have very full schedules, but after a while one has to start to wonder...

So I did, I began where I was on her priorities list as compared to where I placed her on mine.  And I made the prediction that she didn't really want to be with me.  We had made a few plans to see each other, all of which she would cancel so that I wouldn't be able to make any alternative plans.  Several times I was left at home sitting doing nothing particular.

I've seen this type of attitude before and it indicates that that person doesn't want to see you.  Regardless of the rigidness of one's schedule, you can always find time to do something you want to do.  If that weren't the case, procrastination or hobbies wouldn't exist for those who have a, "full" schedule.

Anyway I caught on quick.  It worked like this: we would make plans, and I would let her know when exactly I would be coming (or ask her what time she would be coming) the day of, and she would (this is via text) take a long time to respond, so long at times that I would have to ask again, and then I'd hear an excuse.

I broke up with her saying like, if you aren't sure about this then it probably isn't right to be together (via text, she was at work).  The next day, she called and told me that it wasn't working for her.  I guess I was too subtle the night before.

We talked for a little while.  I told her the truth, how I felt about her.  That she was an awesome girlfriend the first time around.  I wasn't audibly upset because I saw it coming, but I was still bummed out.   I had already associated the song Cinema (Skrillex remix) with her and that sucked because it is an amazing song and now I think about her when I hear it.

Later that night she called me back telling me she made a mistake and that she wanted me back.  Normally my pride wouldn't allow that to happen, to be at the whim of another's feelings, but I could tell that she wasn't being genuine. So I took her back.  I did, not because I was hoping for it to work, but because I think that she was trying to get rid of the guilt of ending the relationship.  I detest people doing stuff like that, so I decided to play her game.  On the other hand, if I'm wrong, maybe things would work out.

So right now we are together technically.  We don't talk much, we haven't seen each other.  And she does the same thing where we make plans and she breaks them so close to the time that I can't do anything instead.  Basically, I'm hoping that she learns not to use other people to get rid of her guilt.

The reason that I think she's motivated by selfish interests (getting rid of her guilt) is because it's normal to feel guilty after breaking up with someone, and the easiest way to get rid of guilt is to make the reason why the couple isn't together the other persons fault.  So if I were to say, "no, we cannot be together, live with your choice"  I would essentially be saying, "we are not together by my choice now".  All the responsibility is shifted from one party to the other.

10 comments:

  1. That was a very short relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, just move forward I guess, there are other girls more worthy of your time.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I had a girlfriend for roughly 2days. Her best friend also liked me I guess so she said we should break up so their friendship doesn't go sour. I agreed and left. Also been in a long distance relationship. They are pretty tricky the farther the distance the harder it is. Ended badly for me. She fucked around.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh followed. Nice posts. Going to the others now

    ReplyDelete
  5. If my girl lived an hour away, we wouldn't last long either

    ReplyDelete
  6. man thats tough and dangerous i don't know if i could keep up the pretence that i was still interested but fair play make her suffer instead of trying to make it easy for herself, selfish witch imo.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Bah, girls aren't worth it. Don't let one tie you down..

    ReplyDelete